BREAKING THE SILENCE: A TRILOGY - Part 1
Beyond Bruises & Swells: Reshaping Narratives on Domestic AbuseWithin our communities, behind seemingly ordinary doors, lies a silent epidemic: Domestic Abuse. A subject often shrouded in secrecy and stigma yet a harrowing reality for countless lives.
Anyone can be a victim of domestic abuse regardless of gender, ethnicity, religion, socio-economic status, sexuality or background. In the vast majority of cases, it is experienced by women and perpetrated by men, but it is important to acknowledge that men can also be victims of such abuse.
You are currently reading Part 1 of 3 blogs, which provides information on identifying domestic abuse and the resources available to individuals who are impacted. While this piece aims to inform, it is not a substitute for legal advice. It is highly recommended that those with legal concerns seek professional advice on the matter.
Having said that, you are welcome to this space. We invite you to embark on this journey with us as we work towards raising awareness, reshaping narratives on domestic abuse and amplifying the voices silenced by fear.
What is Domestic Abuse?When discussing this issue, some envision the image of a woman adorned with bruises and marks depicting violence inflicted on her by her partner and perhaps dark circles beneath her eyes as a testament of her sleepless nights. While this image portrays one aspect of domestic abuse, it only scratches the surface and does not fully encapsulate its reality.
Domestic abuse is not always physical violence. It goes beyond bruises and swells to include situations where a partner, ex-partner or a person you live with:
Emotionally abuses you
Sexually abuses you or pressurises you to do a sexual act against your will
Cuts you off from family and friends and intentionally isolates you
Takes control over your finances or stops you from working
Tracks your phone, monitors or limits your use of technology
Bullies, intimidates, threatens or controls you
What Does the Law Say?The Domestic Abuse Act 2021 defines domestic abuse as:
behaviour of a person (‘Person A’) towards another person (‘Person B’)
where A and B are each aged 16 or over and are personally connected to each other, and
the behaviour is abusive
The behaviour is ‘abusive’' if it consists of any of the following—
physical or sexual abuse
violent or threatening behaviour
controlling or coercive behaviour
psychological, emotional or other abuse
economic abuse: this means any behaviour that has a substantial adverse effect on B’s ability to acquire, use or maintain money or other property, or obtain goods or services
It is worth noting that for behaviour to be abusive, it does not matter whether the behaviour consists of a single incident or a course of conduct
Let us now turn to those who could abuse you for the purposes of this subject. A person ‘personally connected’ to you includes your spouse, civil partner, ex-partner, relative, a person you have a child with or any person you have / have had an intimate personal relationship with. Any of these individuals may be perpetrators of domestic abuse.
Getting Help and SupportIf you find yourself in a situation where you're experiencing domestic abuse and feeling scared or manipulated by a partner, ex-partner, or family member, please know that it is not your fault, and there's no shame in seeking help. While reaching out for support might seem daunting, remember that you are not alone. Confidential assistance and guidance are accessible to victims and their concerned loved ones round the clock.
Below are some options you can consider exploring:
Police
Call 999 or go to your local police station for immediate help if you or someone else is in danger or a crime is in progress. You can also text 999 if you are unable to call them due to hearing or speech impairments
If it is unsafe for you to speak on the phone during an emergency, after dialling 999 just press 55 for the silent solution
Call 101 for non-emergency advice from the police
Other
Domestic abuse services provide a wide range of information and support including helplines, refuge accommodation, outreach support, resettlement support, specialist children and young people services, Domestic Abuse Prevention Advocates and drop-in support
If you are in England, you can contact Refuge’s National Domestic Abuse Helpline. They offer 24/7 service and can be reached on 0808 2000 247
If you are in Scotland, you can contact the Domestic Abuse and Forced Marriage Helpline on 0800 027 1234 or helpline@sdafmh.org.uk
You can contact the Domestic and Sexual Abuse Helpline, 0808 802 1414 if you are in Northern Ireland
Live Fear Free on 0808 8010 800, is a helpline available to individuals in Wales
Women's Aid: this is an organisation that provides services to support women experiencing domestic violence and abuse
Victim Support: this is an independent charity which provides support for people affected by crime or traumatic events in England and Wales
The Men’s Advice Line run by Respect is a confidential helpline specifically for male victims of domestic abuse. They can be reached on 0808 801 0327, info@mensadviceline.org.uk
A Glimpse into Part 2 – Shame, Silence & Secrecy Kills: Report Domestic AbuseEnding the cycle of domestic abuse requires public education, heightened awareness and a firm commitment to holding perpetrators accountable whilst ensuring survivors receive the necessary support to rebuild their lives.
Regardless of whether one decides to report domestic abuse to the police or not, there are confidential support groups available to engage in private discussions and provide comprehensive assistance without disclosing information to the police unless authorized to do so or unless there’s an imminent threat necessitating immediate police intervention.
For persons looking to report domestic abuse to the police, or simply seeking to be informed on this subject, stay tuned for Part 2 of our trilogy on ‘Breaking the Silence’, where we delve deeper into the reporting process.
